As many of you already know, Suzy and I were asked to write "Our Story" for the STORM newsletter. STORM is the appropriate acronym for Super Twins of the Rocky Mountains, a group set up as a resource for parents of triplets or more--yea, more. There's always someone who has it tougher than you, the adage goes. But, no, "tough" is far from the first word that comes to mind when I think of our situation... Anyway, the newsletter features a new family every month, and, well, here is what we wrote:
About six years ago, I went on my first and only blind date. Joey took me to Pasquini’s. We shared a calzone and the slime-ball “forgot” his wallet. I ended up paying. Yeah, it was pretty much love at first sight. Seven months later, we were on our way to Busan, South Korea to teach English for a year. That’s a normal decision to make after dating someone for less than a year, don’t you think? Living abroad was simply something we had both dreamt of doing one day. When one of us mentioned it, we both made inquiries, and voila!, we were on our way and figured it would either make or break the relationship. In any case, it would be a terrific adventure. Two feet in, I guess.
Well, it was fantastic. We “taught” for 9 months and then spent our earnings travelling all over Far East Asia. We even got down to Australia. Terrific.
About three and a half years later, we finally tied the knot. That’s when the real fun started. Here’s a little timeline for you for 2008: married during spring break (we both teach); bought a cute little 2 bedroom house in May; honeymooned for a month in Tanzania in the summer; came back and waited for the malaria pills to run their course; pregnant by winter. Two feet in, again.
And, of course, we weren’t just pregnant...
We both are the last to have children in our respective families. Every niece and nephew was born a singleton, so we had no inkling that twins, let alone triplets, were even possible. My mother had twins on her side, but that didn’t occur to us, or even to her, after seven grandchildren already. Eight weeks into the pregnancy, after some hilarious emotional breakdowns, like when Joey found me sobbing all over some pitiful movie on the Hallmark Channel, we went to our first ultrasound.
We didn’t have a clue what we were looking at: little box, black screen, triangular frame. Lori, the PA we had just met, began the ultrasound and was surprisingly quiet. The silence was long enough for Joey and I to look at each other and nod, thinking, “Oh well, we’ll try again.” Then Lori spoke, “There’s one...” Joey and I looked at each other with exultation: Yes, we are pregnant! But then Lori surprisingly continued her sentence, “... and there’s two...” Joey and I looked at each other again, this time with amazement. I think one or maybe even both of us actually said, “Twins? We’re having twins?” But Lori, transfixed to the screen, and still stuck inside her wondrous sentence, remained silent… Our heads were going back and forth, from the screen to Lori, to each other, then back to the screen, and then the verdict finally came (drum role, please) “...and there’s three.” Joey likes to tell the story that my reaction started in my toes, rifled through my entire body like lightning, and then exploded from my mouth: “Are you sh*^ing me?!” Joey, pale as a sheet already, turned askance, and very quietly said, with all the fake composure you could ever want, “We’re going to need a new house.” Two feet in, indeed!
Then Lori proceeded to say, “Is that a fourth?”
Yes, Joey and I were in quite a bit of shock, as was Lori—this was new for her too. (To this day, Joey claims that Lori actually put two more in there through some technological glitch). I don’t really remember much about that day after that. We did meet my OB, because she needed to verify what Lori saw. She also believed there were “only” three, but she sent us downstairs for a better sonogram just to rule out the possibility of a furtive fourth.
Word had somehow already spread everywhere, no doubt starting with Lori. On our way down to the examination room, people were pointing at us and saying things like “There they are,” “That’s them,” “That’s the couple who just found out they’re having triplets.” Some people were excited, others judgmental. We weren’t available to either reaction, blown like leaves in the whirlwind.
Yep, “only” three. Over the next weeks and months, our shock gave way more and more to preparations. Thankfully I was able to finish out my school year and veg for the rest of the summer. Yeah, I began to look more and more like an equilateral triangle, as my husband so nicely puts it. But, even at the height of my discomfort, I knew I was lucky to have the pregnancy I did.
Deciding we had had enough surprises, we chose to learn the sexes: two boys and a girl. The names we had chosen since we first saw that faded pink line on the pee stick were now used up (Charlie and Scout), but we debated over the other little guy all summer. Not until our doctor actually pulled him out and gave him to the NICU nurses who put him under the heating lamp did Joey walk over and look into his tiny precious face, and confirm what we had been leaning toward: “Yep, he’s a Kiefer.” The OB halted whatever she was doing to me, looked over the curtain, and asked, “Did he just say, ‘It’s a keeper?’” Everyone, all 632 people in the delivery room, got a good chuckle out of that one.
That’s right, Scout, Charlie, and Kiefer, each officially born a minute apart, and all three of them most definitely keepers.
Our great fortune continued past that day as well. All five of us came home five days later. They tried to send us home earlier, but as we were smartly advised to do, we kept the great 24-hour nurse/doctor expertise and help around us as long as possible. After that fifth day, however, they did kick us out.
That first night home was unsettling, to say the least, replete with anxious, almost angry sighs. We felt utterly alone. But the moment passed and the plans we had made soon took full effect. A whole army of volunteers, mostly retired colleagues and friends’ parents, all led by my mother, stepped in the day Joey had to go back to work.
It was a great first year, all in all, thanks to the health of the babies, Joey being a fantastic dad, who, although he was teaching, woke up every 3 hours and fed the babies with me (—I still have no idea how he did it), my being able to take a year off, and all the loving and continual support we received. We are now only 16 months into this crazy adventure, and it is, and still promises to be as miraculous as anything could ever be.
Just as you all know, having triplets is a wild and rare experience, two feet right into the full surge of life, every aspect of it swirling about your heads, quicker sometimes than you can grasp, but beautiful, endlessly beautiful.
I love this website. I think of the 5 of you so much and have a special place in my heart for you. I do hope to meet the three amazing ones some day and of course, to see you and Suzy again.
ReplyDeleteWishing you the best of what life has to offer.
Liz Zavodsky